on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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