I'm jealous of your bromance
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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