this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
