I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
so let's talk penis.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
