Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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