I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
