is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
where does the pee come out of this thing
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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