You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
