piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
