Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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