I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
