So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
