Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Randomize
