I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
