Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize