i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
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