what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
