you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize