They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
