i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Who put my cat in the fridge?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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