It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
