escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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