forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize