Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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