oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
It's just like the Real World with babies
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
