ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
