I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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