My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Randomize
