Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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