very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
