Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
