omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Randomize