Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
