Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I am naked and annoyed.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize