Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
He? As in you personified your dick?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
