Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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