does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
