Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
