I just made out with a guy for $7.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
