There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Randomize
