I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
