i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize