everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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