Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I'm too high and old for this...
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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