Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize