you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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