woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Randomize
