We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize