so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
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