just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
