We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
My cat gives me a boner
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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