You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
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